OP: Not getting aroused...

When my Man and I fool around I can't seem to get explosivly aroused. I guess since I've been stressed from work it is interfering with my love life. How can I relax and enjoy it. He seems to have no problem cumming but I have been having problems. What can I do to calm down and relax enough to clear my mind and enjoy sex and foreplay.

(when my mind is full i can't feel much that good)


Posted: 30 Sep 23:36


Well, your man might help you with it. How about a nice dinner then you come home, a bit of wine, food that you love, then a nice relaxing bubble bath with candles all around it, a relaxing massage from your man. That could help. Try it, I eman, it won't hurt if you do. Good luck


Posted: 30 Sep 23:37

well i think your member name says it all.
you think about work way too much.
try leaving work at work.


Posted: 30 Sep 23:37

Yeh, definately, leaving work at work is the key element. Work itself can interfere with many different forms of relationships, intimacy being the main one.

Some tips on how to unwind after work?

1- Leave work at the office. If it's absolutely essential you bring work home, make sure it's no more than twice per week.

2- In the last two hours of work, make a list of things to do for the following day, prioritising all your tasks effectively and never start anything new for the rest of the afternoon (unless it is significantly a smaller task). Aim to have your last job done half an hour before you're due to finish, that way you won't be rushing your tidying up to head home and you wont have anything incomplete pending for the next day.

3- Have a set place to stick your work bag and/or breifcase, and any other work related items. Have them at the front door in a wooden box or basket. When you come home from work, stash your work things in the box/basket and don't pick them up until the next morning. Never carry excess luggage/junk to work. If you like to take your make up , brush etc. to work, have two of everything. That way, you can have a make up bag for work, and one for home. No rushing to make sure you have everything before you leave anymore!

4- Try relaxation techniques. In the evening before dinner (make sure it's before dinner) go for a short walk or head to the gym, depending on what's your kind of style. Before or after this (it really doesn't matter -as long as it's before dinner!) lie down for five minutes, and close your eyes. Feel your body relax and image the air being drawn into your stomach and exhale fully. This will help to clear out your head and empty out workday stress.

5- Write it down. If a particularly difficult situation at work has made it nearly impossible to relax once you're home, grab a pen and a piece of paper. Write about the incident (without lifting your pen from the paper) for three minutes. When you're done venting on paper, scrunch up/tear up the sheet and throw it away.

6- Instead of doing the same routine every time you get home from work, try something different. Talk to the kids for a bit, have a glass of Kahlua, have a massage....something to start your "Official" evening off with. Have something to look forward to when you get home, leave yourself a little surprise!!

7- Reduce all that clutter! A cluttered place = a cluttered person. Clean up and get all those bits and pieces lying everywhere, away! The less things you have lying around, the more relaxed and comfortable you will feel. Have one day/evening to clean up, and maintain it! Personally, it's a fantastic feeling to wake up to or to come home to - a perfectly tidy house. It just feels happy!

8- Listen to Music! It's such a great element of relaxation and freedom. Either get some CD's and pump up your home cd player, listen in the car, and dont be afraid to purchase a portable cd walkman - you can always get a car kit for it to be played in your car, too! They really are a great investment! Listen to tunes that get you feelin good inside, and dont just listen to the same tunes all the time - listen to your moods and pick the tunes from there.

9- If you seem to have enless chores (laundry, paying bills etc.), space them out so you dont have to do them all in one nite. Many like to save their things till the weekend and do it all in one hit. That's fine.
I like to think of my weekends as a break from work, however, and choose not to save these things till then.
If these need to be done (dishes etc.) do them straight away and get them over and done with. Never allow chores to accumulate or else they will continue to build up and you wont have any time to relax! Do them how they come and just chill!

10- Read something! It really can be quite enjoyable. If you catch the bus or train to work, this is the perfect time to tune out to what's going on around you and induldge in some novelty reading. Before you know it, you're at work, and you didn't even know where the time went. Another great thing to do to relax is reading before bed. Remember, if you're going to read while you're in bed, make sure you dont put your book straight on the bedside table next to you. Keep it out of vision, totally!

11- If there's a hobby or just something in general that makes you happy everytime, use it to your advantage!

Just remember to not think about work at home, and if it doesn't leave you alone, write it down. If its something you need to remember for the next day, write it down. But do NOT let work get to the better of you!

I really hope these tips are of great help to you, and good luck!


Posted: 30 Sep 23:37

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