Sex with a married inlaw, wanting to restart???
I'm new here and although it seems not very much is current here. What I've noticed is that those that have posted and replied are intelligent and insightful.
That said, my problem is that when I was 19, my sophomore summer at home I started babysitting for my Cusin. Need I say more? He is 10 years older then me. I'm 26 now and it seems to be rekindling. When I was 19 I had just broken up with my first bf. My Cousin offered to pay me for babysitting, so not having a job, I agreed. Her husband, who is a real looker, intelligent and just turned me on, made advances with accidental touching, then finally feeling my breast in the kitchen as he grind against my butt. I only resisted like a few seconds. That happened a few times only more intently, like under my top and in my shorts, or up my mini skirt that I would wear just for the occasion. I knew it turned him on, so I don't blame him. I mean he did start it, but I flirted encouraging him.
The first time we had sex was in his SUV, after that it was at his house, my house, wherever and whenever. That went on for most of the summer. I was in love. I was crazy for him, we Often had unprotected sex where I let him cum in me. He thought I was protected.... I'm not one to give oral randomly, I have to be deeply emotionally involved, trust. But I would with him, and he didn't have to suggest or guide me towards it. I don't sleep around, but I have a lot of sex with my bfs, only 4 encluding him.
Now I'm getting that feeling back about him. He's been hitting on me. Sending text messages. The occasional phone calls, and I saw him at a bar with his pals. He came over, talked hug each other and we exchanged a on the cheek kiss where he said he missed me. I only smiled and have been trying to tone down the replies and physical response. Even as I write this, I can feel the fire burning within me for him. He use to rock my world sexually. Most of the times I would orgasm. But that's like normal for me after about 5 to 10 minutes, just saying though.
There are some very sensible people on here, maybe someone can talk me out of sleeping with him. God knows I want to, but I'm afraid of repercussions if we are found out. My parents would have a fit, not to speak of his wife (my cousin). All,I feel now is that I want him, not just sexually. Yes I have a bf, I'm back with my first bf who I love, but not the same way.
Replies:
Re: The quality of the forum:
We used to have some really great members before we changed software to a much worse system / the rise of the social media conglomerates. What you're seeing now is the best of the best from nearly a 10-year 'golden age' that ended about 5 years ago. I've pulled these posts by hand - one at a time - to avoid importing all the lower quality posts. A couple of the old members have been lurking a little, waiting to see if the board comes back to life, and sadly a few have passed on. I'm hopeful it does come back to life, but either way, I felt the weeks of work (with weeks to go) would serve as a tribute to all the time the community invested into helping others.
Re: Your situation:
Sounds like your cousin-in-law has some serious mojo over you... and perhaps vice versa. Have you explored the thought that at least part of your attraction to him is based on it being forbidden? Do you think you would feel the same way about him if he was single / on the market?
You seem to be well aware of the possible consequences of getting found out, so I don't see much point in beating that drum to you... though I will add that there are their children who could also be affected by your actions. You are likely an aunt to them, and that relationship could be severed as well. I imagine most of your family would likely be taking your cousin's side in the worst case scenario... and that's something you need to be ready to face already based on the prior history... and even more so if you want to continue down that road.
Running under the assumption that they are not in an open relationship, there could also be a red flag in that he's cheated on your cousin with at least you in the past... if not others. Would your attraction to him be affected by knowledge of how many others he has gone behind your cousin's back with?
From a different perspective, do you have any intel on how your cousin feels about this? Have you looked into the possibility of having your cousin's consent? Perhaps she is / would be content with them having an open relationship, or would be open to having you in on an occasional threesome, or you and your boyfriend joining them for some swinging?
Thank you for the cogent and insightful advice. My cousin is not that girl to have a 3way, I think??? I would never with her. I've only been with one female and that was / is my bff gf. I'm sure my cousins husband has been with other women in the past six years since him and I.
I'm sure there are and was serious feelings between both of us. Several times in the heat of passion he had told me he loved me, in in the same breath told me I was the best fuck he ever had... his words. I suppose that could be taken with a grain of salt . What bought it to an end was when he encouraged, manipulated me to have sex in the kitchen when his wife was taking a shower. Even more scary was that I had on shorts. I only took out one leg and kept my pantie on. But he did cum in me. My fault because I lied saying I was on the pill. Actually I had only been taking them for a couple week when that happened. Anyway, yesterday after work with my gf, I met up with him for a drink. He didn't know she was going to be with me. Had a few drinks, talked as he rubbed my thighs under the booth. Warm evening, short skirt, andni had flash backs as he reach my pantie. He knew I was wet. No I didn't cross my legs, just the opposite. Anyway, this morningnhe called wanting to hook up tonight. I politely made excuses not to, but never closing the door on the idea. I suppose I just have to know he is there if I want him. But No, it's over, I hope????
Where is the consideration for what you're doing to your cousin / the rest of your family?
It's not like I can unring the bell, it should have never happen to begin with. Now I'm just tempted by memories. But I'm keeping my feeling in check. Your right, I have not shown any consideration for my cousin. I was more concerned with getting caught then her feelings. Being a women you may be able to see both sides to this. A horny 19 y/o, in a wild state of mind in my teens. I didn't /don't sleep around, if you read the back story. He just made it easy for this to happen. I appreciate what you're saying, now itsmup to me to end this.... thanks!
I wasn't referring to the past... can't change what's happened (though we should always make an effort to learn from our mistakes - and more importantly - make up for them). I was just a little bothered that you weren't seeming to be putting much consideration towards your family... and something like that getting out could have terrible consequences for a lot of relationships...
I can definitely relate with friends though... have been in a similar situation with two bf's of friends... I chose to tell the friends instead of acting on it though... One friend didn't believe me... and dropped me as a friend over it... only to be heart broken later when she found out that he was doing this regularly. The other friendship was strengthened by it. Trust is a very delicate thing... :)