2 years after my daughter was born, I still have zero interest in sex [f]
My daughter will be 2 in July and I have not had the slightest want or need for sex since she was born. I don't even get turned on anymore buy anything. I never think about sex or talk about sex. I used to be very adventurous with my husband before my daughter was born. I just can't seem to figure out why I am so bored with sex. I still find my husband seriously attractive. Although I do not have the same thoughts for myself as of late. I used to be a exotic dancer and since I gave that up my body is not what it used to be especially since my daughter was born. I am not extremely over weight by any means. Heck most women would call me a "lucky bitch" for having a 7lb baby while only being a 5'3 and 100lb woman. I am now 110 and my husband is constantly telling me how "hot!" I am. I am just not as fit as I used to be. I am a stay at home mom.
I guess I just can't really pin point the cause of all this. I try to think about the beginning when it all started and the main thing that sticks out in my mind is the fact that I have developed this "agoraphobic" tendencies since the baby was born. I have panic attacks when I have to leave the house to do something as simple as grocery shopping. I have tried to fit this problem into the idea that it may be the reason for my desire to basically wither and die. But I am most comfortable at home and especially with my husband.
He is my best friend and lover. I could never see myself without him. I want to be able to show him how I feel but I just simply don't want to.
Does anyone have any idea what could help me in this very strange situation??
Thanks in advance for any advice.
If you have any questions on anything you think I may have left out or what a more specific detail about something, just ask me...
Ziggymarzz
Replies:
GO SEE YOUR DOCTOR ASAP!!
Seriously - you have a medical condition lurking inside somewhere and if you want to get back you life you're going to have to get to the doctor's right now. Take your daughter with you.
EvilEvilKitten
I have considered going to the doctor but with no insurance I am afraid of going and finding that I need to see a specialist or medications that I cannot afford. I guess that is my anxiety working and telling me every wrong thought about what I really should do. Not to mention the leaving the house to go to the doctors. Even talking about it makes me very nervous and shaken. I would love to get my life back because before all this emotional controversy I was a very social and friendly person.
I guess money should be no object when it comes to mental health and happiness and I will definitely take your suggestion into serious consideration. Thank you EvilEvilKitten!
Ziggymarzz
...and in addition, in order to establish a baseline, ask for a referral to see an endocrinologist who will run a check on your hormone levels.
dancingdoc2
Should I see my OBGYN for this refferal? Or will a family practice doctor be able to do this as well? As you saw from my last reply I am in a financial bind and my first option would be to go to a walk in clinic. Though I realize they only deal in certain cases. Such as work related injuries and viruses. So I don't think the walk in clinic would be best. Do you?
Ziggymarzz
Find your local free clinic. Why the financial bind since you have a husband who presumably has employment?
"before all this emotional controversy I was a very social and friendly person."
okay what is going on here? what emotional controversy?
See a general practitioner first.
EvilEvilKitten
Well it's not easy out there. My husband had some legal troubles and were paying monthly fees for that. Because of what is on his record he cannot get the best paying jobs. Not to mention bills and the baby. Then you add my college tuition I am paying for since I am not receiving any financial aid. My husband is doing his very best to provide for me and our child. I don't want to go on and on about financial woes because it's not like were poor. We just can't afford anymore bills on top of what we already have.
As far as the "emotional controversy" I am referring to the battle I have withing myself everyday to just get over this and pretend like there is no real problem. I'm not as friendly as I used to be, because I don't get out of the house and socialize anymore. But after hearing what other people have to say about my situation it is becoming very real to me how important some medical treatment is.
I guess I am just a little bit stubborn. I feel as thought I can handle anything on my own and for most of my life that is the way I always was, but these days I am not nearly as strong minded as I used to be.
My husbands best friend actually has been diagnosed with agoraphobia. He was on bed rest for 2 years after having back surgery. We were talking the other day, comparing our anxieties. He told me that he had read somewhere that there was a study done on spinals and how they effect the brain. He didn't develop agoraphobia until after the back surgery. I didn't start having the same traits until after my epidural when Teegan was born. Maybe this could be why but who knows....
Ziggymarzz
I'm thinking this sounds like PPD, or Postpartum Depression, which can account for all of the described issues. Do some research on the web for yourself and see it you fit. There are treatment options for this condition.
Michael
mikkiji