OP: Menopause?

HOT FLASHES are the undisputed tell. And sometimes, while on hormonal contraception, the period does not appear or reminds us of when we first started menstruating - hardly more than a spotting. If she is on Seasonale or other that eliminates the periods for a long time,w e switch back to the monthly pill.

I tend to keep patients on the pill because pregnancy has occurred during menopause several months after the last real period. And then we talk about hormone replacement therapy. Controversial, yes, but with my first hot flas I wrote myself a script.

Brandye

Posted: 23 Sep 21:03

Thank you, Brandye.
I'm asking because we have a suspicion that it's creeping up on my mother; she's 46 which I believe is relatively young but not unheard of, but she is on the injection, so we were slightly unsure whether we should rely on other symptoms alone.
I know a call to our own doctor is probably in order, but it just wasn't a priority at the moment, due to seemingly spending half our lives at the doctors as it is, it's hard to find time for one more appointment!
Would this be a bad time to completely drop hormonal contraception (taking into account things other than pregnancy, I know it would be a bad time to drop contraception entirely, when based on an only *presumed* lack of ovulaton)?
Thanks for the help.

Beckeh

Posted: 23 Sep 21:03

Do not presume anything. Menopause is only a bit less predictable and uncomfortable than puberty. I have see women go six months, give up contraception and wind up pregnant.

Especially being on the shot, which I do not recommend, it takes a while to get the stuff out of her system. She should have a good chat with her doctor and maybe get out her old diaphragm (or, better, a new one) for a few months.

Brandye

Posted: 23 Sep 21:03

That's what I meant; I know it's unsafe to assume ovulation has stopped, but I wondered if, other than pregnancy, there were any reasons to stop hormones completely, because otherwise the diaphragm or similar seemed a good idea at the moment.
Thanks for the help, looks like we're off to the doctors once more :p

Beckeh

Posted: 23 Sep 21:04

Might wish to talk to your Mom about switching off the Depo. and on to oral BCPs. This was the first step a Gyn took with me for Hormone supplement and since I also required BC.

Later, after no period and the physical symptoms had disappeared fully [hot flashes, no real period happening, etc.]; I was put on HRT which is a lower dose of the combo BCP [Estrogen & Testosterone] and was told to take the Progest. daily [rather than 12 days a month only] when the physician had monitored me for long enough. He said the Combo of the two HRT daily [Progest. in one first pill, with combined Est. & Testosterone in the second pill] was sufficient at that time to prevent a pregnancy & obviously since single [condoms were recommended].

Well, so far so good & no issue. I was very concerned myself about his recommendations since the potential for a pregnancy is present yet would be a disaster due to the eggs being bad, if one did release. I knew there was no options other than to term. the preg. However, I have been fine on the lower dose over the BCP's and feel much better. I would have your Mom discuss options with her Gyn when the Depo is wearing out. Also much has to due with if she is able to take estrogen based contraceptives secondary to any family history of breast CA. If this is a positive risk, the good old barrier method and nature doing what it does on its own [going through the change of life] it what needs to be. Brandye is having a better time than I with the symptoms than I!

At best I could say days I felt jittery, hot flashes, nervous, lack of sleep, occasional mood swing which mimicked insanity [to me] until I sought medical care for them...the key was the skipped periods accompanying all this. And well; Estratest is my best friend after taking it honestly 6 months...and adding the Progest. helped mimic a normal hormone level which a woman at my age [just after 40] should have...the libido followed. The BCP's were okay for a temp measure but the Estratest was the best relief for me since I was "absent", such as, "no detectable traces of serum hormone measures present" on several occasions confirmed by Medical Centers & Docs. Present were hot flashes, mood swings, no cycle, and no libido...the dx? Premature Ovarian Failure at a late age since it's more often seen in younger women!

Bear with your mother...some day you will see what it feels like. Hopefully you both "transition" more as Brandye has v. myself! One significant point is when women hit this point, realize there is help. The first symptom was lack of libido [rather mow the lawn than look at a man] accompanied with hot flashes to BEAT the band! Later the cycle went askew--followed by some "nuttiness". Be open with your Mom & keep a good dialogue happening she is happy to have you! My Mom was ready to sent me to the Psych ward first!!! I also agreed if there were no real physical findings I would seek psych treatment! Thankfully, it was just hormones for me at a early age.

sera300

Posted: 23 Sep 21:04

Mum and dad have been married for nearly 21 years so I imagine a reliable contraception would be needed, but I also know my mother took the contraceptive pill some years ago, so I imagine that wouldn't be a problem for her. Would BCPs help with indicating a loss of periods? As in, would a withdrawal bleed still be present? I know BCPs prevent ovulation anyway, but am unsure if no ovulation due to these would be any different to no ovulation due to the menopause.
Hehe, puberty is a pretty fresh memory for me, I don't plan on being menopausal anytime soon :p But I'm just kidding, I know *one* day it'll happen, and I will stick by my mother, I know how it can make some women act and feel, and I think I'm prepared for it heh =] Thank you for the input.

Beckeh

Posted: 23 Sep 21:04

B:

What I was told by the Gyn was take the pills and if I did not get a period just begin the new pack if I did [or did not] get a period. Take the pills wait and re-start at the usual time. The BCP is fine...

Over a few months, some symptoms eased some did not...loss of libido was a killer for me...so I was put on the HRT which is a lower dose of BCP's; however, I had testosterone in mine. Rare bleeding but the hot flashes a wild-ass mood swings finally left. Now about a year and half later? No period. I was told to take the HRT daily [both pills for BC] and add a condom being single. Now back to my usual very sexual self.

I did not know what was wrong with me since I was very young...I had no need to look at a man! I'd rather go & mow the lawn. Had the onset of mild then progressive hot flashes with a odd period, skipped days or months. Then felt like a psychopath who was sweating even out to dinner w/family. I went to the gyn begging for lab work. I thought it would come back normal...I was ready to go see a psychiatrist...the doc called about the hormones & levels...and back in for a repeat visit--welcome menopause & it takes about 4-6 months until. you feel better with hormones [yes, they help initially but not to the extent you thought]. How one gets the hormones? BCP or HRT? Does not matter...preventing an unwanted pregnancy during this phase is essential and either will help with ovulation prevention. Let her period do whatever it chooses, not a big deal assuming all else is ruled out. No period does not=no ovulation!

Honestly; she needs to see her gyn...why? There are risk factors associated with Hormone use; DVT, smoking history, chance for failure of the pill, history of breast cancer in the family, etc. Only she & her doc can make the choice...I would, at over 40 if in her shoes, choose an IUD either w/ or without synthetic hormones based on my medical history.

Only she can choose what is best for her...with all the information given by her MD

sera300

Posted: 23 Sep 21:04

She's currently weaning off anti-depressants after being on them for longer than I thought any doctor would recommend. With this in mind, I'm not sure it's the best time to be messing with hormones too; she's okay in herself, just some minor symptoms, and curiosity about what to expect when the time comes, even if it isn't now.

But I do understand that it will require a trip to the doctor, I was never trying to avoid that in any way. I'm sure she'll go soon, just not *right now*, so I thought I'd do a little research first.

Thank you for all the help.

Beckeh

Posted: 23 Sep 21:04

The main risk when going through or beginning the onset of menopause is you may or may not ovulate. Just because you are missing a period for 3 months does not mean the next month you may not get one or there is no indicator as to if you will/will not ovulate. Hence, Brandye's warning. Generally most Gyn's say no period for one year and menopause is here & it's confirmed with labs as well. There is no guarantee.

BCP's suppress [stop ovulation] if taken properly. Yet they also still have a failure rate and some medications interfere with the efficacy of the Pill. Remember someone has to be the margin of error while using the pill and taking it 100% correctly.

Lack of ovulation is the same if it's via BCP use or due to the ovaries shutting down when at the end of child bearing years; it's just how it's induced. However, there are a few who believe they are "home free" and find out an unpleasant & unplanned surprise. The main issue with those who are older, or as myself, the eggs even if you are to ovulate are too old & a pregnancy is risky for the unborn child; it has to do with having a child with Downs or other birth defects.

If a woman who is young becomes pregnant while on the pill, they have viable eggs & the pregnancy has other issues but not close to those who are older. I honestly believe women should not have children after 40 and believe even pushing close to 40 is too risky. Your body is intended to reproduce earlier on. I know how science can make "miracles", as they say, but the only real option is through someone else's eggs and pumped up full of hormones. Then chase a toddler around? No way! Thinking at 46 say; there would be a child born and when that child is 16; I would be 62 teaching them to drive? And when I am 64 they graduate from HS? NOPE!

If you want to learn more, there is a great deal of info on the Internet of Menopause...look under any Women's health sites, your mom may love you for it! Good luck!

sera300

Posted: 23 Sep 21:05

You are adding significant facts. That is the reason physicians want a full medical history for anything. I do hope that she is being guided through the withdrawing of the anti-depressants.

Brandye

Posted: 23 Sep 21:05

I wasn't too specific at first because I was asking mainly out of curiosity, knowing now wasn't the best time to begin any change of contraception, etc, for my mother, and that we'd surely visit a doctor when she did plan to act upon it.
Thank you for the concern, and I assure you she saw a doctor before changing anything concering her anti-depressants, as we are aware it's not just something you can take upon yourself, and she has been informed by them what to do.
Thanks once again.

Beckeh

Posted: 23 Sep 21:06

I have gone thru it ( at age 45) and my drive has dropped. Dryness etc. It frustrates the hell out of me. I want my horniness back. I can and do have sex. Just have to use lube. But that, " I just want to fuck now!" drive is gone. It takes me a lot longer to warm up. I thought menopuase would be great. It sucks.

I did the hormones but had to go off them because it has been over five years and it is not a good thing to take them longer than that.

I have searched the net looking for ways or things to pick up my desire level.

Also I work nights and I am tired a lot. I am taking calcium and vit D eating right and in fairly good shape. I exercise when possible.

Anyone got any ideas at all how to pick up my drive or something I can take safely that is not a hormone. Why in the hell can pharm companies come up with Viagra but not a horny pill for women!

Bassgirl

Posted: 05 Oct 23:17

They've tried but women's feelings of desire do not operate like men's so they are perplexed. So far, nothing they've tried has worked.

Menopause has been great! Sure lube but so what? I'm having far more fun now than before!

Sex begins and ends in your head but your working nights and being tired is having a huge effect upon your drive as well.

I recommend setting aside time for proper amounts of sleep and also setting aside time for sex - make room for it in your life. Really, just how clean does a house have to be? Decide you like sex, you love sex and you're not going to let anything get in the way of your enjoying sex.

BTW it is your testosterone that gives you desire, not estrogen. As your estrogen drops so does your testosterone rise - relative to your estrogen.

EvilEvilKitten

Posted: 05 Oct 23:17

I am almost 45 and have started menopause a while ago.I still have a good desire for sex,but yes the dryness,hot flashes do get in the way.I absolutely love sex and sometimes get frustrated with my partner,rather than blame menopausal symptoms for the lack of it.He is two years older than me,and I swear that male menopause exists as he is always too tired.When we first started having sex he needed Viagra to keep erect.But I think it was just nerves as he hadn't been with anyone for a while.EEK is right,get plenty of sleep and factor into your schedule time for sex.Pamper yourself and have plenty of lube and sex toys handy.

Aphrodite_66

Posted: 05 Oct 23:18

Talk to your doctor about the possibility of testosterone. Sometimes helps; sometimes grow hair on your chest.

At the first signs of menopause, I wrote myself a prescription for Premarin. Still on it and lube has not been necessary but most of my recent contact has been with another woman. There are simple ways of getting small doses of testosterone that help many with the desire.

Brandye

Posted: 05 Oct 23:18

I was on Premarin but it had been almost 6 years. So time to come off of it.

I have read about testosterone, hair on the chest scares me. LOL but I would be willing to try it. What are the simple ways of getting small doses of it?

The dryness does not bother me so much as just the lack of drive. I can remember being so freaking turned on that I couldn't wait to fuck. I ached (sp?) for it.

I would like to try small dose testosterone.

Thanks EEK and Aphrodite.

I try to sleep when I can but it is really hard. I work 12 hour night shifts. When I am off I am up in the middle of the night most of the time. I take Ambien but even that only helps a little.

I will keep working on it. I really just want some drive back.

EEK what you said about it a lot of it being in my head I think is true. Going to start working on my thought processes as well.

Thanks to you all for your input. I love this board!

Bassgirl

Posted: 05 Oct 23:18

The good news is that many women simply "get over it" and most remain orgasmic (if they were) but simply lack the desire. You do need to talk to your physician. The cause could be physiological, including low testosterone, or it could be psychological. Some women, down deep, develop the idea that they are no longer women because they are not laying eggs. This is similar to some women becoming non-orgasmic after partner has vasectomy because "they are not getting all they have coming to them." Can turn into real therapy sessions!

The results with testosterone are spotty. For some women it is a godsend; others, not so much. It is available in shots, patches, salves, lozenges and pills. Step one is determining whether testosterone is the cause and, then, you and your doctor decide on the delivery method.

In fact the hairy chest is very rare.

Brandye

Posted: 05 Oct 23:18