Let this be a lesson to you in judging other peoples’ lives. You gave people around you a lot of crap because you believed you knew what was best for them, but when faced with a similar situation you did the exact opposite. On the other hand, since Pregnancy and STDs/STIs are all very real risks when you become sexually active, you were probably looking out for the well-being of others when passing out advice. Nonetheless, it really isn’t fair to universally judge others, especially when 1. Your friends may not share your same religious beliefs, 2. You’ve never been in such a position before, and 3. Your friends very well may have felt the same way you do about your current boyfriend when they chose to have sex, i.e. they love him, they’re going to get married one day, etc.

With that said, now is not the time to cover up your actions and pretend that you actually followed your own advice; it’s time to practice what you preach, or perhaps rethink what it is you choose to preach. Anyone can say that they stand for something like a set of principles or religious dogma, but it takes a person with the utmost courage to acknowledge their own transgressions. Understandably, you’re probably worried you’ll be labeled a hypocrite and would rather lie about it to avoid being judged, but lying is just as bad as passing judgment!

Crap happens and everyone makes mistakes, even you. That’s just the natural part of growing up. For the future, focus on practicing more tolerance and understanding, and as far as today goes, resist the urge to uphold a false image. Prove to your friends that you always mean what you say; you’re allowed to change your mind about things, you know! Besides, no one can fault you for admitting you are just human, especially if it comes with a sincere apology to anyone you have offended with your rigid stance in the past. :)

There’s one last thing. You never said if you ended up getting a ring or whether any mention of marriage was on the table. Whether he proposes or not isn’t as important as practicing Safe Sex in the meantime - if you decide to continue having sex with him, that is. No matter what the outcome, married or not, using protection and taking appropriate measures to safeguard against Pregnancy and STDs/STIs will protect your health and well-being, and it’ll also make it easier to change your mind if your boyfriend doesn’t end up being “the one.”

Posted: 17 Aug 18:50