OP: husband really wants anal

Yes, there are many threads on this topic. Please do a search and you will find a variety of views from both men and women.

I have a varied sexual toolbox but allowing anal penetration is not in it. I do enjoy being rimmed and anal stimulation during oral sex. The anus, however, is designed as a one-way valve - to allow stuff to pass out but not in. The tissues of the rectum are one cell thick as opposed to the forty cell thickness of the vagina. That gives the vagina great elasticity but the rectum has little. The vagina has natural lubrication that allows thrusting comfortably; not so the anus and rectum.

I have been flamed before but will say again that tears always result from anal sex until the muscles and skin stretch. This opens the tissue for infection. In the long term (read age sixty not thirty) hemorrhoids are to be expected and bowel looseness may well result.

With your mindset starting out, you will undoubtedly tense up and make things worse than they would otherwise be for yourself.

That is my medical view. Many people here have other views. Please read them.

Brandye

Posted: 24 Sep 00:31

I'm a guy and I love anal sex (giving). However my curtain girlfriend doesn't want to try it. She's scared for all of the same reasons that you are, minus the not trusting me because of lies. Even though she trust me very much, I think that she is scared that if I get going, I won't want to stop, even if she wants to. I know for sure that I would stop, but I also know that I would be somewhat disappointed, so I'd say that she has a really good point. After much discussion about it, we decided that it wasn't going to happen anytime soon because she just isn't ready. I'd be a liar if I said that I am happy about it, but I do respect her opinion, because I care about her. your husband should too. But beyond all of this, the fact remains that it is YOUR body, and YOUR choice as to what enters it. Your husbands opinion is irrelevant. The only opinion that matters is yours. Don't do it if you don't want to.

cjb1981

Posted: 24 Sep 00:31

Here's a good situation, I am twenty, my girlfriend eighteen. We tried anal sex about a year ago, we used TONS of lube, and she said it still hurt, but was bareable. Somehow, she got an infection and her bowel movements were painful as hell for the next couple weeks. We took her to her doc and he said everything was normal, despite the infection, but if we did it again because of so much ripping, as Brandye said, she could get hemroids and an early age. I guess me being over average in girth did that part, but the fact remains it's very possible.

Yariome

Posted: 24 Sep 00:32

I really appreciate everyones honesty about this. I think this is just something that I'm going to have to debate alot over. I'm definitely not for it.

fireangel2284

Posted: 24 Sep 00:32

What y'all seem to be overlooking or circumventing are three things:

T#1: You talk about this first and decide just what is acceptable and permissible.

T#2: Regardless of the above limit, you always begin with fingering and/or rimming the outside of the anus. If this is the limit of the person on the receiving end, so be it. If one or the other of you wants penetration, then again, it's the finger first up to the first or second knuckle. If this is the limit, so be it.

T#3: If you want to use a toy or dildo, then work up to it as above, first. As Brandye has stated, many people do not desire or want a penis inside, so you'll have to be content with 1, 2, or the dildo.

dancingdoc2

Posted: 24 Sep 00:32

you cant just start with anal sex you need to start stimulation manually and see how you are with it. With the attitude you have on it going into things you will be miserable and it will be a terrible experience. Be open minded about trying anal stimulation but be progressive on it. If your not comfortable with it then dont. Try to be open with your discussions but something like that is truly 2 sided and neither partner should be forced.

tasty

Posted: 24 Sep 00:33

Perhaps I'm simply too impatient. People used to think that smoking was cool too, for instance... until everyone found out about the awful risks and consequences. Now, it's not so common, and is even shunned to a degree. I imagine that the same thing could happen with anal sex, but it certainly grates right now, smack dab in the middle of the popular ignorance phase.

Blink

Posted: 24 Sep 00:33

Blink in the US the majority of doc's need to see patients just to keep their doors open. The patient load has grown so vast, insurance has reduced the ability to really treat a patient that the use of alternative practitioners such as NP's & PA's have increased drastically. In an ER, it's not uncommon that your full work up is done by a RN with a MD sweeping in. But the insurance & non-payers have caused this and lack of proper regulation in US healthcare the industry.

As far as your question...yes, you can have microscopic tears, later leading to issues in life. Not there yet cannot tell you personally. Professionally have seen some damage by all sorts of sex behaviors/acts...don't ask!

Later in life as a male you can develop urinary incontinence women can develop conditions where the cervix protrudes the cavity. Exact causes unknown. There are always risks in life. All in moderation is good!

sera300

Posted: 24 Sep 00:33