I'm sorry to hear you're affected by two such nasty conditions. I'm not personally familiar with MS, so I can only guess what could(not) work for you. But I am familiar with a pouch, as my former partner had one.
My experience is that the bag on his belly could actually handle quite a lot :) During the years I have only once accidentally knocked it off. I could lie on top with my full bodyweight on him. Which may be a bit scary at first. But the bag could handle a lot of weight and friction.
How comfortable are you with your pouch? And how comfortable is your partner with it? How do either of you respond to mishaps?
I know it's been 7 years, but I'm not simply going to assume you have both adjusted to this change. Since people all handle this differently. Though I think acceptance and being relaxed about it should be the goal. At times I used to explicitly show my partner that I wasn't afraid or disgusted by it; I kissed his scars on his belly up to the rims of his pouch. Other than that, I often lost sight of how he had it. Once upon a time he told me he could never really be naked since he'd always be wearing something. I went by every bodypart and was confused cause he seemed as naked as one could ever be to me. I simply hadn't noticed he was talking about the pouch and when he mentioned it, felt sorry that I had forgotten. Instead he smiled a little teary-eyed that to me he was simply complete.
Are you comfortable with your appearance? If not, you could try a pouch-bag or a pouch-belt. These belts are made of soft cotton, that snuggly fit around your waist and cover your pouch. The bags only cover the plastic pouch itself. I hope they are available in your part of the world as well. My partner only used the bags once upon a time to feel more comfortable. I know people who stick with them and even buy beautifully decorated versions :)
I know some positions are better than others. Particularly when gravity starts to "pull" on it, which felt rather uncomfortable to him. Have you tried smaller bags?
Why are on-top positions "not so great" for your partner? I know for me the rim of the pouch used to leave imprints on my skin. We learned to adjust the rim, so that the thicker part was directed to his side. I know there are several brands of materials, so this may not be applicable for you. But it may be worth looking into :)
If I may be so blunt to answer DD2's questions; no these kinds of pouches can't be de-attached for a while. The smaller intestine is almost constantly producing very liquid waste. There are several systems available. Either it's a one-part-system with adhesive on a plastic bag that sticks on the skin surrounding the stoma. Or it's a two-part system with adhesive on a ring that goes onto the skin surrounding the stoma and a click or stick system to attach the plastic bag to it (you can exchange the bag without having to exchange the adhesive on your skin, which can be highly beneficial).
NB: if someone has a pouch connected to part of the colon instead of the smaller intestine, there could be possibilities of flushing the waste out of the colon and temporarily sealing the stoma off.
RedRoses
Posted: 03 Oct 07:09
