OP: Swinging experiences

My girlfriend and I have been together three years. We've been into the swinging lifestyle for 2 years although we've never fully swapped (it's mostly been girl girl while the guys watch). However, we always seem to get with couples that have issues with each other and when we plan to get together for some fun, they end up fighting and we end up sneaking out. Has anyone else had this experience.

On a different note, we're going to be heading to a swing club in South Florida and we would like any advice or stories as to how we can approach another woman. Cupcakes is eager to be with another woman but she's shy and says she doesn't know how to flirt(although she flirts great with me). And it just seems dirty when I'm the one doing the flirting and the suggesting like she's not into it, it's all my idea. Any thoughts? Thanks guys. Have a good week.

Twinkie and Cupcakes

Posted: 01 Oct 22:56


The dynamic of swinging is pretty different from most sexually-related issues.

Based on what you posted, i'm wondering a bit about
1) HOW you meet the couples you have already played with
2) Why, if you're not going for a full swap, you don't just look for a single woman. This would eliminate alot of the "couple drama" you have been experiencing.
3) What are you looking for in a woman for your wife? Do you have any requirements? age, size, body type, race, etc?

The fact taht you are looking for a female to play with your wife, and you want to be there to watch can make things uncomfortable for some couples? Since you call yourselfs "swingers" couples will expect to have some sort of group interaction..and thats probably why you're getting drama. Some hubby's don't want to just sit back with you and masturbate while the ladies are all over each other. Thats why you should think about looking for a single gal.

now, that said, it seems like 90% of all so-called "swinging" couples are looking for a 3rd female - for etiher full sex or some combination. Just know you're in a very competititve sexual market andyou'll have to be patient.


Posted: 01 Oct 22:57

Thanks for the reply. To answer some of your questions;
1. The couples we found were mutual friends of ours who one day got onto the topic and we discovered that they were interested in the lifestyle that we were already into.
2. The drama isn't between us and other couples, it's between the male and female of the other couples.
3. We would love to find a single female for now but the only people we find at the club that we go to all have husbands or boyfriends.
4. We're still rather new to the swinging lifestyle and only recently have found another couple that we would feel comfortable with fully swapping (however we haven't had the chance to express this to them yet). My girlfriend has varied taste, from young and sweet, tight bodied, with no fat, to older (30's) with different body types. She's more about the personality than the looks really.

I agree though. It is a very competitive scene out there. Sometimes you need to act quick or sometimes you're just not what that other couple is looking for. I just hope we get lucky this weekend. Thanks again for the reply.

Twinkie and Cupcakes

Posted: 01 Oct 22:57

My husband and I have been into the lifestyle for about 4 months now. What we have done is sign up on a swinger website.

Paying a small amount of money entitles you to a few more perks and the ability to see the more naked pics of people. I think we paid $20 for three months.

On the site you can put as many pics of yourselves as you want. Write up a very detailed profile of exactly what type of people you are and what type of people you are looking to meet. The site is broken down into areas that you live in so it will give you the ones closest to you first.

It has its own mail, forum, and chat room and its own private chat.

We have had really good results. So far we have talked with many couples and have met a few for just a meeting. We were just recently with our first couple that were perfectly suited to us and what we were looking for. We are planning to get together with another couple very soon that we have been chatting with for over a month.

One of the things that I use to find the right couples or single is instant messaging. By chatting on line for a time you can really get to know someone and see if they have the right personality and what you are looking for. I have rejected many because they just didn't fit my personality well.

But we are looking for friends with benefits and not so much just someone to swing with.

I have talked to several that haven't liked the club scene for the reason Rawbob stated in that its very competitive and somewhat of a meat market.

Good luck and happy hunting.


Posted: 01 Oct 22:57

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