Slow to Orgasm...
Sex begins in the brain and therefore her attitude towards sex, her attitude toward her partner, and her relative happiness with her current situation will ALL affect her rate of orgasm. Happier = faster.
That being said, there are physical and medical issues that also will affect her. If there are any such issues, consult a medical professional for assistance. There is no need to be bashful or shy about it, they are there to help.
Several points to be considered include her willingness to lose control because she cannot have an orgasm until she's willing to have one; her level of skill and experience because the more she has had, the more she tends to want; and if she is distracted at all by too hot, too cold, if the children might hear her, or anything else.
So, she has to enjoy sex, think her partner is wonderful, be all relaxed, aroused, and her mind focused upon OMG this is GREAT! Anything she and her partner can do to help her get into this state should be done.
Here are a few hints to help you along:
- Stop thinking about everything else except OMG this is GREAT! Focus.
- Make her physically comfortable.
- Breathe! Do NOT hold your breath.
- Relax! Do NOT tense up your muscles.
- Let it come, roll on through, and go. And let the others right behind that one roll on through as well.
Practice periodically during the day focusing upon steps 1,3, and 4 above in your mind. Doing this will train you and the aroused state will be quicker to achieve when the time comes. If you have a partner of whom you are fond, picture this person in your mind while contemplating 1,3, and 4 above.
Women are uniquely capable of having as many orgasms as they desire at any one time. Women are equipped with 4 hotspots which can usually, but not always for all women, cause orgasms when stimulated. Shape, size, age, fitness level - none of that really matters, women are physically equipped to get the maximum enjoyment out of sex. And with no refractory period to be bothered about, women can go for hours. Yes, you can.
All it takes is practice.
EvilEvilKitten
Replies:
Women can be satisfied without being satiated; men can be satiated without being satisfied.
Why do we not understand each other in sex?
Brandye
Thanks EEK, for your great advice. I've only had clitoral orgasms within the last year, and I've learned to be very comfortable masturbating to climax in front of my fiance. I'd like to expand on that now--like while he goes down on me, or fingering me, or just being inside of me. Are those things that just come with time? Is there a good way to transition from one to another? I know we're on the right track, partly because it's getting easier & taking less & less time for me to orgasm while masturbating. I would just love to be able to have a great vaginal orgasm (I feel many small ones) or one while he is a little more involved with the end result.
tboostbug
It will come with time and your increasing comfort with your partner. You do have to overcome being shy and having body issues before you can really 'cut loose'.
EvilEvilKitten
Not always true.... There has been times during sex that I would get to the very edge of having an orgasm and it would just go away. I had this happen to like 3 times during sex. It was very frustrating. But it has gotten easier for me to orgasm because I used to never have any during vaginal sex, only during
oral.baby_cat_82
i definitely have to show this post to my wife thank you. Its hard for her to reach an orgasm i have given her one before vaginally the second time she had to use a vibrator so yeah. i do know her emotion towards sex is frustration most of the time because she is always thinking about how she never gets a orgasm. i try everything to spice up the mood. if she gets close to a climax but looses it she becomes frustrated and will either tell me to stop or she will become dry and yea you can see what comes next. now im not one of those guys who is selfish i do want to please her , its a turn on to please her but she thinks im just a selfish guy because she tells me im the only one that gets to climax :( ill show her this article in hopes she can give these tips a try
Cy-anide