OP: how long should a guy last?

I'm not very experienced, but I've started seeing someone and I've found that when she is pleasuring me or we are having sex, I can easily last for at least an hour without breaknig a sweat or releasing my load.

Its not that I don't ejaculate or anything, I do both with her and when flying solo, it's just I generally go for ages first (that said, it doesn't take that long when i'm alone although i tend to rush it)

Is this not too long? Shouldn't it be quicker than that? Could it be a problem or am I just paranoid and should in fact be grateful?

aceofspades 01/12/2007

Posted: 23 Sep 05:36

Replies:

More thoughts:

> I've found that when she is pleasuring me or we are having sex, I can easily last for at least an hour without breaknig a sweat or releasing my load.

The reason you can last is because more often than not, the type of stimulation you are enjoying from your partner is not quite what you are accustomed to and rely upon to bring about your orgasm. So, what usually happens is that we enjoy a tremendous build up of sensations, even beyond what is required to trigger an orgasm, yet because they are not what we need to trigger one, we just languish near Nirvana from these exquisite sensations that we cannot achieve on our own.

> Its not that I don't ejaculate or anything, I do both with her and when flying solo, it's just I generally go for ages first (that said, it doesn't take that long when i'm alone although i tend to rush it)

The reason you can vary how long it takes you to climax when providing your own stimulation is because of the internal feedback each of us has and uses to monitor our progress up the arousal curve and then to make tiny midcourse corrections if required. Because the feedback tells us just were we are and just what we need we can then speed up or slow down changing the timeline for when we will climax.

> Is this not too long? Shouldn't it be quicker than that? Could it be a problem or am I just paranoid and should in fact be grateful?

When we turn the reins over to our partner for our pleasure, we sidestep our internal feedback and the benefits this provides. What I recommend a couple do is to provide each other with verbal or non-verbal feedback as a replacement. Verbal can be any word or utterence; non-verbal can be a squeeze of the hand or some other form of body language that conveys specific meanings.

I think we have answered the question above. My purpose here is to outline why things are happening they way they are and how you can change what the two of you do in order to change the speed faster or slower as you progress toward an orgasm. All this information holds true for her with you as well.

dancingdoc2

Posted: 23 Sep 05:36


If your question concerns making out, making love, and just fooling around without intercourse then the answer is for as long as the two of you desire.

If your question concerns intercourse, and how long to hump, pump, and thrust away, then the answer for most women is about ten minutes or less as any longer just becomes tiring, boring, and sore.

If this latter one is of concern to you, then you should understand that lots and lots and lots and lots and lots of stroking is not the way to build your arousal to the point of orgasm--making out is! Stroking should be used to maintain a pre-existing high level of arousal; thrusting then peaks this and takes you over the edge and beyond the point of no return. Ordinarily, a couple should not begin intercourse until a) you are invited, and b) you are on the verge of triggering an orgasm yet can still maintain control. This is what all the Necking, Petting, Heavy Petting, and Foreplay are about in the hour(s) leading up to intercourse. And it is this that brings a couple full circle and back to the first answer.

dancingdoc2

Posted: 23 Sep 05:37





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